Walmart workers to filthy customers – “Thanks for the help, assholes!”

By Justin Sider

3/22/2020

Retail workers have a lot to contend with right now, but it seems Fayette County citizens are pitching in to help out in their own way.  The Fayettenam Times went to three separate Walmart stores and found the parking lots covered with used hand wipes, empty sanitizer bottles, gloves, surgical masks and…  earplugs???

One Walmart worker commented on the positive effects to the environment these rubber gloves can have. “It’s still cold at night here.  Hopefully some young kittens can nestle up in them and stay warm,” he said.

We found one man gladly tossing his surgical mask into the parking lot.  “I just bought this car. This is a $1,700 Chevy Cobalt. I can’t have these filthy people filling up my nice new ride with germs. I only have 22 payments left until she’s mine,” he said. 

As of tonight it seem that only the discarded wipes were blowing into the nearby parking lots, but hopefully the Sonic crew arrives in the morning to find a healthy supply of used latex gloves and the rare surgical mask or two strewn about the parking lot. Remember – Happy hour is 2-4pm every day at Sonic.

We saw one little girl blowing into gloves like balloon animals and then stomping on them to hear them burst as she giggled and laughed.

One little boy was thrilled to make play toys out of the discarded gloves, “Paging Doctor Miller to surgery, paging doctor Miller,” the jovial little boy yelled.  As he put an old surgical mask he found on the ground over his adorable little face, he said, “I just want to save lives when I grow up.”